I arrived back at the ocean early in the morning. The parking lot was empty except for a few van life souls.
I sat on the concrete bench again and wrote in my journal for a while.
Listening to the ocean and watching the waves.
Hey Big Blue
These moments were perfect.
We’re so often hurried by things we have to do, people we have to meet, business we have to attend to.
Moments of solitude have become a luxury. However, I believe they are a necessity.
Especially for those sensitives among us who deeply need this time to rest and recharge.
It’s awful that there are days where I feel like I can barely give myself 5 minutes of peace.
We need more sacred slow time.
Our modern lives are stuffed full of technologies and software that promise access to this free time or sacred slow time if we purchase their product or hit download.
The truth is, the only thing that will give us access to that free time is less obligations on our plate. Less items on our to-do lists. Less responsibilities to take care of. But this is also reliant on our ability to say “no.”
Saying “no” is something people pleasers, like me, have a hard time.
But I’m learning that I am my happiest, best self when I feel open to engaging with the world. I feel open when my to-do list is small and my anxiety isn’t triggered.
I also think there is something to be said for more intentional, focused time. Personally, meditation and putting my phone in another room when I’m working has helped with intentionality.
These are just a few of the thoughts that floated around in my head while I was writing by the sea.
I had not decided what I was going to do that day or where I was going to sleep that night.
Never had I experienced that kind of long term freedom. I’m so used to a structured existence. It makes me feel like I’m in control of my life. It makes me feel safe and secure.
But traveling this way….this“the plan is there is no plan” way…being in nature every day, turning strangers into friends, wandering around tiny towns, surfing wild waves, living out of a car and suitcase, made me feel free and exhilarated every day.
Maybe, this is the life I truly want or maybe I want both. Complicated desires, as usual.
I went to GIG for breakfast. I also left a charger there.
I sketched and wrote in the café for a bit. Martha was working again. We started talking and I told her I was still unsure of my plans and whether I should stay another night. I wanted to surf but I couldn’t decide which surf school to go with. She gave me the number of her friend’s friend Chico who was a surf instructor. After I contacted him, he told me that all the lessons for the day were booked but he had an opening in the morning.
It was settled. Stay another night in Ericeira and surf in the morning.
I couldn’t quite leave a world surfing reserve without surfing now could I? Plus, I had an intuitive feeling that I shouldn't leave Ericeira yet.
“Leah, since you’re staying tonight do you want to come out with us?”
That night Martha showed me around her hometown. We sipped wine by the sea, ate hot steak and garlic sandwhiches, and traded secrets the way new friends do. Martha was not keen on the idea of me sleeping in my car, even though it was ocean adjacent, and let me crash in her house that night.